It is all lies!

How can you turn a religious monument, a historical relic into Disney. Come to Meteora.

The weird thing is, I think I have been here before. I went on holiday with my Sister and her daughter, Amber and we went to these weird monasteries set amongst the cliffs. However it doesn’t feel quite right. We were on Skiathos, so to get here would have been a ferry and a three hour coach journey, and I think Amber could have only been about three. Jane, my sister, hates coaches. Then we would have been on an organised trip, my recollection is vague. But it must have been here. How strange. How differently I have seen them this time, with time to explore, time to look, you often see beneath the facade.

This location is amazing, a geological wonder, and as architecture goes these buildings are pretty special. Perched precariously on these sandstone pillars they seem to defy gravity, and the age at which they were built, the labour, the ingenuity. Every tourist takes a miraculous intake of breathe, these monks were pretty special.

But I actually think something else is going on here. This is tourism at its most cynical. This place is not real, not authentic, this is a piece of Disney, as facade-al as big thunder mountain, as fake as adventure island.

Who knows where the original starts and the fake takes over. Is that bridge and the stairs up safe for tourists, or designed for monks?

That roof of modern tiles, factory produced.

And here they are, enlarging one of the monasteries! So they can fit in more tourists, maximise the profits! Or are they faithfully restoring it? With reinforced concrete, concealed electrical ducting and data conduit. This is not restoration, this is a new build, using all modern techniques, just made to look old. Made to look old for tourists. What are the minimum amount of monks you need for an authentic monastery? Two, otherwise they might go mad, only one of these needs to believe in god, as long as they bring in the tourist euro!

Readers may be aware of my anti religious tendencies. Might not this be impacting upon my view. This is not about religion. You may have come here for religious reasons, but what you would find is pure commerce.

That exhibition turned out to be, a shop selling all sorts of religious tat. The shop owner got pretty annoyed when I tried to photograph one of his more respectable ‘exhibits’ which was for sale, a plug in Jesus; a pink or blue nightlight for your evangelical son or daughter. The lack of taste was astounding. I will seek one out to show you, maybe I can find one on the internet.

This is not quite right it was much cheaper and much more tacky, but you get the idea.

Could you design a more perfect tourist attraction?

It would be difficult;

History

Location

Geology

Views

Exercise

Accessibility- this we will talk about later.

And even so, it is pretty amazing.

Not a bad bit of architecture.

Yesterday, we were told nothing. Today we get to know a little, by inference.

They liked wine.

Pretty big barrel that, maybe all that alcohol helps them get closer to god, one way of putting it I suppose.

It seems a lot of energy went into the wine.

The didn’t bury their fellow monks! bit weird.

Normal tacky cartoon like imagery.

But then we got to this really strange exhibition about war and the fight for independence.

I think there was a tenuous link with how the monks helped out, but it was really an excuse to show men with weapons in uniform.

“History can be distorted depending which side tells you the story. I have never seen such an obvious, propagandistic story, only in fascists history books. The church proudly depicted how much the Greeks suffered to gain their independence. It was like watching an spaghetti western film: we, the Americans, are the good boys; them, the Indians (who don’t forget were here in the first place) are the bad guys. This is to show how dictatorial, imperialist institution the church is. Needless to say, this also shows how much involved the church used to (and still is) in the political life of a country” SM.

All very strange.

Back outside, and more picture postcard stuff.

Especially those long distant shots.

But is that really what it was like. Those monks were good at all the topiary, quite natty with the old scissors.

But when you are in a tour group, it is all probably really convincing.

We left, moved away from the coachloads, stepped off of the path, and was immediately isolated, not a soul around (or sole).

Tourists just a distant memory.

We had found a walk to another monastery, no longer lived in. Actually two, one abandoned, one derelict.

That landscape was even more amazing, because now there was a lack of Asian tour groups and coaches.

Just cliffs, geology

and a monastery.

Original, untarnished, unaffected by tourism.

Why? No road so it cannot be squeezed into a half hour itinerary. It is as cynical as that. This one died, because it was off the beaten track! Darwinism even affects monasteries.

But also, no room for expansion, just can’t fit them in by the bus load, can’t go up or sideways. Should have thought about that before you located it here. It was never gonna work as a tourist attraction, Monk’s you just can’t trust ‘em.

And also a pretty cool sculpture.

And a cross.

But these are never seen by the average tourist. No time! Maybe they can buy a small model to put on the mantelpiece. It almost looks like that.

It was a nice walk. Ours walks were the best part of Meteora. It has been the an amazing visit.

This time what I will remember the most is the geology.

And the lies.

GDR